I'm so in love with my memories.

It's quite incredible the amount of things you can be thankful for within 24 hours. Today I was merely thinking of how amazing my parents are. And how I am the mix of the two of them. How my dad and I had similar friends and my mom and I had similar boyfriends. I've always appreciated what my parents had to say, mostly because I have related to them. I can't say everythings always been peachy, but I can say that I wouldn't blame them for it.

I spent a lot of time with my family over the holidays. It was a good time for me, full of video games, giggling, giving, receiving, out of the ordinary activities. I wouldn't trade Christmas 2008. I'm so in love with my memories.

I just finished a good conversation with my Dad. I don't get to talk to him often, so when I do, it's very good. Often times he says the things I've wanted to hear or the things I've needed to hear.

The essence of who you want to be.

No matter how hard I try, I think human relationships are probably the toughest of all interactions. A cat might ignore you but you won't ever fight over the bathroom and a dog might annoy you but you will still cuddle up with them at bedtime. I'm not sure what makes a relationship with say an animal easier than a human being, besides a one-way conversation with no-one to back talk. Is it really pride that keeps "cat ladies" amongst the felines they adore so much?

I say this from my own experience. Some days I really wish I had a cat or dog to just enjoy the company. I get lonely sometimes, and sometimes all I want is a purr or a nice doggie kiss. They don't judge me or frustrate me nearly as much as a human.

People assume that by "relationship" someone is referring to a romantic one. I'm talking about all relationships. For me, romance is the least of my worries. I struggle day in and day out just to maintain friendships, and acqaintences a like.

I definitely do not profess to be some great friend. I've always been good at meeting people and enjoying their company and hoping they feel the same. But maintaining a friendship gets sloppy and frustrating. To be honest, sometimes it's easier to blow someone off than to be nice. I'm not saying that's what we should be doing, I'm just saying the thought crosses my mind at least 100 times a day.

1st day, job #2

Today went well, and the idea of responsibilities is surprisingly not frightening. At the moment I feel relieved to have a push in the right direction. I find myself fullfilling unsaid goals, meeting unwritten requirements. It's less alarming now, and I feel like just maybe the glimmer of hope I feel, will turn into a full fledge light of change and my life will be a little more on track.

I'm not saying I'm some horrible person or that my life is going in the "wrong direction". I just feel like in my own heart, that I'm going down a path of something I don't need. Laziness, unfullfillment, those are things I control. ME, not someone else.. not the media or the internet or anything. Those are things I allow in my life. If they make me lazy it's because I'm choosing to be that way.

I feel terrible when at the end of the day my thought is "well another day that I didn't do anything I love to do nor get anything done." That, I hope I don't have to tell myself again. One day at a time. One glimmer of hope at a time. A chance to change.

Sharing some youtube.

http://www.makeupgeek.com/

This woman is amazing! Her makeup tutorials are amazing, she does a great job too. Halloween is coming up so a lot of the looks are perfect, but she has some everyday make up too!




This is the look I am thinking for Halloween.. BUT there are so many.. I just can't pick!


-Whitnee